Penny-Sized Penny Stories (And A Commentary on A Facebook Comment)

10 May

The best theme for today’s Penny Story is “miscellaneous.”   Rather than a cohesive (or as usually the case for me, a mostly cohesive) blog post, I’ve got several small money-related stories.  Penny penny stories, if you will.

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1. Art Club

At art club last night (Yes, I am in an art club.  No, this does not mean I can draw. I live in fear that the club will discover this and kick me out), I asked if anyone had a cool story about a penny.  I got this one:

“When my sister and I were kids, she told me that if we put pennies under our pillows, they’d multiply.  Being young, I believed her.  I would count out some pennies, put them under my pillow, say the magic words with her, and then recount the pennies.  There would always be more pennies afterwards than there were before.  This might have been because I was too young to count properly, or because my sister was sneaking extra pennies into the pile, but it was still pretty cool to me.”

You’ve got to love older sisters and their tales of magic.  I’m pretty sure I terrorized both of my younger sisters with fake magical powers when we were younger.  For some reason, they both still like me.  Go figure.

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2. Art Club Part II

Also at art club last night, someone else mentioned that they knew a person who would sweep up pennies on the floor and then throw them away.  Yes, you read that right- they would THROW AWAY THE PENNIES.  Like they were made of dust rather than precious copper and zinc.  I’m proud to say all the club members paused at that statement.  These people get it- pennies matter.

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3. The Best Facebook Response By A Student Loan Company

Let me start by saying that I do enjoy working with my undergrad student loan company.  They are polite, helpful and supportive every time that I call.  This might be because I’m actually sending them money each month rather than just calling to complain, but that’s beside the point.  The point is, I got an email from them the other day, telling me that if I liked their page on Facebook, I could be entered to win either an iPad or a Macbook.  I already have an iPad and I don’t really care for Macs (chill out hipsters- Macs don’t care for me either.  Long story), but I figured it was worth it to see what kind of stuff the company had on their FB page.

It turns out they answer questions and respond to every comment on their FB page, usually within minutes.  That’s pretty impressive, and shows that the company is living up to their claim that they’re open 24/7.  So, not being one to miss an opportunity to plug my own blog, I posted a comment.  This is what happened.

There’s so much brilliance here, I can’t even handle it.

I wasn’t completely sucking up.  Like I said earlier, Nelnet is much nicer than my graduate student loan company.  That’s mainly because my grad student loan company can’t be bothered to answer their phone or check their fax machine.  Once I finally do reach a human, they’ve been invariably polite and helpful.  It’s just a lot of work to get to that point.

But let’s refocus on this reply, particularly the “we wish we could keep you forever!” line.  They wish they could keep me forever?!  What is that supposed to mean?  The way I see it, there are two options:

  1. “We wish we could keep you forever!” = “We love having you send us money each month! Thanks for being a great customer!”
  2. “We wish we could keep you forever!” = “Legally, we can’t keep charging you interest forever, but boy do we wish we could!”
One is nice and polite, the other is a bit more sinister.  I’m not sure which I’d prefer: a company that sucks up to me as much as I suck up to them, or a company that never misses an opportunity for truth in advertising.  When I saw that line, I figured that either Adam here is a master of double-meanings, or he read Monday’s entry about why I overthink everything and thought it would be funny to mess with me.  Either way, well played Adam.  Well played.
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That one line by itself would have been good enough, but Adam chose to follow it up with “let us know if there is anything we can help you with.”  At this point, I realized that he probably didn’t click the link and read my blog.  I think I’ve made it pretty clear here exactly with what I could use help.  In case I haven’t, allow me to make a short list:
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  1. A full-time job, preferably one with a yearly salary well into the 5 digits.
  2. A check (or two, or three.  I’m not picky) for $8,851.13, made out to either me or the loan company, and preferably drawn on a real bank account.
  3. For people to see that paying off debt doesn’t have to be such a scary thing- and that sometimes doing it publicly can be a lot of fun.

In Adam’s defense, he’s got a lot on his plate: FB comments to moderate, clever double-entrees to craft, and since he’s likely a social media intern, probably his own student loans to worry about.  He can’t be bothered to click on every link that someone posts on the FB page that he’s been assigned to monitor.  But his response to my post, whether intentionally clever or not, made my day and provided the inspiration for this entry.  So, really, a double win.

Not a bad start to a Thursday.

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As always, if you have a story involving a penny, a person named penny, a phrase using the word penny, or just a cool story that you can tell in under 500 words (unless you’re me, and take over 1,000 words to get to the point), drop me a line and let me know.   Comments are below, and the email address is on the About Me page.  Or the About The Blog page.  Or the About Penny Stories page.  I can’t remember.  Sorry.

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One Response to “Penny-Sized Penny Stories (And A Commentary on A Facebook Comment)”

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. a pile of pennies « zendictive - July 20, 2012

    […] You’ve got to love older sisters and their tales of magic.  I’m pretty sure I terrorized both of my younger sisters with fake magical powers when we were younger.  For some reason, they both still like me.  Go figure. (more of this story found here) […]

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